Attachment theory is often discussed in therapy, but it shows up in daily interactions too. Our attachment style—shaped in early relationships—affects how we connect, argue, and seek support.

Step-by-step ways to recognize and respond to your style:

Identify patterns: Notice how you react under stress. Do you withdraw, cling, or try to fix everything quickly?
Name the style: Anxious styles often fear abandonment; avoidant styles may downplay needs; secure styles balance closeness with autonomy.
Bring awareness to triggers: Recognizing when your attachment system is activated helps you pause before reacting.
Practice opposite actions: If you tend to pull away, try staying present for one more moment. If you tend to pursue, take a grounding breath before seeking reassurance.
Build secure habits: Develop routines of honest communication, empathy, and self-soothing to strengthen security over time.

Attachment styles are not permanent; with awareness and practice, you can grow toward greater security in your relationships.